You're finally here heh

Six Hundred and Sixty Four days ago, they took away my liberties, my rights, my civility. Now, it's all come back. M*%$&$f&%#%%s (heh it so happens that the cover of Hallowed Be They Name by Cradle Of Filth's playing).

If I remember correctly, the song I'd resolved to play the night before ORD was "It Ends Tonight" by the All American Rejects. I suppose this would do for now. heh. It's hard to describe the feeling, though. Surreal would be one good word, albeit heavily overused.

Had dinner at Tony Roma's with Calvin last night, and it didn't seem so long ago we were Foxtrot 2 Sect 3 Bed 7 and 8 at SISPEC; not so long ago we had shots of tequila, declaring "ONE YEAR TO ORD!" at MoS; not so long ago when "aiya, wait until after ORD then say" was the ultimate excuse for procrastination - ORD happens to be sunday, or rather, friday if my news sources are reliable. So we've survived - now what?

For starters, I've got SAT 2 chem this sat and I'm kinda screwed. Shall get to work on that once I'm done here. Noted (a word whose use has become less than comfortable for me). Actually it's just the inorganic parts, but I won't wager too much on my capabilities. After that, it's off to Frankfurt, then the northern regions of France. Damn my passport isn't here. Shall have to check that out. SHIT.

And you, this is for you: Take your time to sort it out - we, or at least, I, know all too well the rationale behind "more haste, less speed". I don't REQUIRE anything; in fact, all that is so far has exceeded reasonable expectations and greed isn't a path I intend to head down. It's probably an apt coincidence that I'll be heading off for a fortnight, giving you a chance to work it all out. I hope whatever conclusion you get to is favorable, but the bottom line should be your benefit.

Come on feel the noize, girl rock your boys, we'll get wild wild wild; wild wild wild. - Cum on Feel the Noize, Quiet Riot.

Someday I'll Be Saturday Night :)

Hey man, I'm alive, I'm taking each day a night at a time
I'm feeling like a monday but someday I'll be saturday night

Hey my name is jim where did i go wrong?
My life's a bargain basement all the good shit's gone
I just can't hold a job, where do i belong?
I'm sleeping in my car, my dreams moved on.

My name is billy g my love is bought and sold
I'm only sixteen i feel a hundred years old
My foster daddy went, took my innocence away
The street life ain't much better but at least i'm getting paid and

Tuesday just might go my way - can't get worse than yesterday
Thursdays, Fridays ain't been kind
but somehow i'll survive

Hey man, i'm alive, i'm taking each day a night at time
Yeah i'm down but i know i'll get by
hey hey hey hey man, gotta live my life
like i ain't got nothing but this roll of the dice
I'm feeling like a monday but someday i'll be saturday night

now i can't say my name or tell you where i am
i wanna blow myself away don't know if i can
i wish that i could be in some other time and place
with someone else's soul, someone else's face

oh tuesdays just might go my way, can't get worse than yesterday
thursdays, fridays ain't been kind
but somehow i'll survive

hey man i'm alive i'm taking each day a night at a time
yeah i'm down, but i know i'll get by
hey hey hey hey man i'm gonna live my life
i'm gonna pick up all the pieces and what's left of my pride
i'm feeling like a monday but someday i'll be saturday night

someday i'll be saturday night, i'll be back on my feet, i'll be doing alright
it may not be tomorrow, baby that's okay
i ain't going down, gonna find a way

hey hey hey man i'm alive
i'm taking each day a night at a time
yeah i'm down, but i know i'll get by

hey hey hey hey man i'm gonna live my life
like i ain't got nothing but this roll of the dice
i'm feeling like a monday but someday i'll be saturday night

oh i'm feeling like a monday but someday i'll be saturday night

Clarification, Gentlemen

It has come to my attention that people have become concerned regarding my attitudes and behavior with respect to my soon-to-be-ending army life. Most regard it as a move to the dark side, especially with "excused accordingly" in effect till after ORD and my considerations for OOC-ing int spec course very much in place. As such, I find it befitting to clarify my position, for I'm not one who acts without considering consequences. In fact, these actions were taken in full knowledge of consequences, at least, those pertaining to myself.

First, on the issue of diametrical change. To people who've worked with me like Zhenghong and Sherwin (not berne, of course.. he'd know better haha), I seem to have gone against what I used to stand for: working hard, doing things the right way etc. Superficially, that is the case. More than that, though, it would be appropriate to realize that circumstances have changed. Fundamentally, my goals have not. In training, it is in my best interests to secure respect and avoid people getting the idea that i'm slack, such that I have bargaining power when it comes to the most important thing in army life: SLACKING. getting days off, essentially, is impossible when commanders have a bad impression. On the micro level, the only reason why I decide to sleep early during training time is so I get enough sleep (reminder: i love sleeping); the reason I decide to wake early is to beat the toilet rush so I can go down to wherever we need to fall in and, you guessed it, SLEEP. so, I am consistent. I have not changed my stand.

Secondly, addressing Sherwin's question: "... how you change until like that [i.e. the status quo]". To this, the best answer would be "the same reason they, whoever 'they' are, can decide to mess up my last three weeks in army before i ORD, spoil my plans, burn my off and proceed to impose a ban on me clearing my DESERVED off even if i OOC and go back to 42." Now does that make sense? to a regular, probably. to an officer, probably. if so, DO IT TO YOURSELVES. If you have the right to impose your morality and values on me, then don't blame me when I fight back. Let's just make it clear here: I've NEVER bowed down voluntarily to anyone (yea maybe except God, but he ain't human so that doesn't count). I respect, but never to the extent of BLIND OBEDIENCE. IF you expect me to, so to speak, "LAN LAN SUCK THUMB", then honestly you don't know me well enough. Circumstances are man-made, and are hence man-modifiable. There.

Finally, but clearly not the end since I expect more attempts at curtailing my liberties on the way, this goes as a amicable warning. All this time I've decided to play along with your little "i have rank therefore I PWN you" game - wake up to reality, idiots. This isn't the real world. Go fight your imaginary enemies - I don't give a hoot. Try pulling me into your little make-believe world one more time and you'll regret you ever enlisted me and put me through everything you did. I planned for my tolerance to last with the previous flow of events, such that when i ORD i'll minimally be AMICABLE - I won't kill. Now you've exhausted the last vestiges of my tolerance, don't blame me if i turn murderous. Trust me, I'm capable of it, for "The pen (or in this case, keyboard and printer) is mightier than the sword (or your rifles, tanks, whatnot, no thanks to your hierarchy being no more than a sad cycle where the bottom is really the top. don't get it? go ruminate, cows)".

I'm proud to oppose.

I swear, one day the idiocy that so clearly characterizes the SAF will be put to an end. even if not by me or someone i know.

Honestly, which decent, reputable (in the good sense) organization does things like give one week's notification that:
1. I've been selected (smell the odor of sarcasm in that heh) for Intel Spec Course at SMI, and that the course duration is from 8th oct (next monday) till 2nd NOV (sounds familiar? ORD!!!)
2. now that really isn't the problem. the problem is here: i've got LEAVE. 8 days leave + 3 days off = 11 days. as of last week, i'd only be able to clear 5 days, leaving 6 to burn.
3. as of now, i've only cleared 1. and it's wednesday. wonder why? cos some IDIOT had to mandate that shooting around at SAFTI 100m range in BODY ARMOR is a requirement to ORD.
4. point to note, i was notified of tuesday's shoot on monday. cool eh? after i CLEARED out my cupboard.

seriously, all this wouldn't have happened if those creatures actually took the effort to decide who to send earlier and let us know what's coming up. ironically, the SAF doesn't practice what it preaches (or demands).
- if you wanna take off, you must give early notification so THEY can plan manpower schedules; THEY, on the other hand, have the right to do anything they want, even with 2 hours notice. seriously, we're not on perpetual 2NTM.
- THEY speak so strongly of us fulfilling OUR obligations to the country (or rather, just their cause to reach higher ranks); the reverse, obviously, cannot be expected. (also in line with the abovementioned cause)

these are just pertinent to this issue. everyone knows all the other rubbish that goes on eh? honestly, i don't want to bother. but burning 7 days of my leave is a mockery, so i have to care, no?